Best wishes for you Nevvy! If I were you, I would have used time to write down what goes on with you now. Then you can bring this with you to your doctor and it will help so you don't forget anything. I would also have asked to be put on antipsycotic medication again if I were you. Please stop drinking! If that is difficult; one way to do that is to fill your glass to the top and not fill it to the top the next day, the day thereafter continue to fill less in the glass. After a week you have come to the bottom and to the end of alcohol. What about drinking a coke instead? Alcohol may destroy your opertunities to become better.