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Hello Itadakimasu:
I have no idea if your parents are trying to kill you or not but after reading your post I can certainly understand why you're feeling that you could be expendable to them.

I'm trying to think of some helpful words to say. On the one hand, you've seen a psychiatrist and you're on some medication. I think it would probably be helpful for you to seek out a therapist or counsellor you could talk to as well. It's possible your psychiatrist might be able to fulfill that role but "talk therapy" is no longer a common component of psychiatry. There is a forum here dedicated to the subject of psychotherapy. You could probably get some good ideas where to start there.

I think it might also be helpful for you to try and identify one or two people in your social circle that you could go to if you really needed some help, ideally, this person would be an adult. Perhaps you have a favorite aunt or uncle, a friend of the family, a minister, teacher... someone. I do understand that sometimes it's easy to feel that there's no one around who can care that much about you, but I think it would be helpful for you to try and find someone. If there really is no one that suggests to me all the more why you could benefit from therapeutic counselling. It can be very isolating to go through what you're going through if you feel there's no one you can talk to about it.

I also suggest that you begin journalling your thoughts and experiences. Here's a brief article excerpt that explains why that can be helpful and how you can get started:

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what is journaling timescale?
Just as in diary keeping, you can use a diary or journal to record daily (or otherwise) entries in date order and your account of your experiences over a course of a day or a period of time.

what is journal writing techniques?
In the 1960s Ira Progoff, pioneered the use of diaries in psychotherapy. He created the Intensive Journal Method in 1975. Using his technique, he found that patients in psychotherapy who recorded their fears and worries were able to better manage their personal and difficult issues more efficiently than patients who did not. His work focus on how to use journaling or diaries for the purpose of self-awareness, finding your true self, and healing from personal troubles, including physical illness and trauma. Journaling as we know it today, springs from Dr Progoff's earlier work.

There are numerous simple, yet powerful writing styles and techniques to help you express yourself. For example, your perspective on a given event or situation; your pain, fear or anger; and what/how you're experiencing and feeling.

[b]Self Help: Journaling


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I'm sorry that your family isn't being anywhere near as understanding as you need them to be right now. That sucks in the worst way but it may be that there's nothing you can do to change them. However, you do have the power to change you, including learning what you need to do to take care of yourself and then, doing it.