Hi,
I went to a rehab last year for 65 days to get off of Ultram, Ultracet, and benzos. Over the previous years, I had become very dependent on these prescribed meds, as well as Vicodin, Norco, Ambien, Percocets--plain ole opiate addiction. So I got off of those, but then was discharged on Phenobarbital. So then I sent to see a doctor who had a "program" that he and his associates taylored: (I stayed in one of houses his son used for a Bachelor's pad), they had caregivers for my comedown, he 'stabilized' my medication. This doctor kept me three months, got me off the Phenobarbital, and put me on Suboxone, which the treatment center started me on, but I had taken myself off, he put me on Librium as well. It worked well for me, the Phenobarbital has been out of my sytem since Feb., but I don't remember a lot--that's scary.
So I was on 6mg of Suboxone and over 10 pills a day of Librium (at first), over the last few months, and for about 3-4 months now, I am down to 25mg of Librium, and 2mg of Suboxone--to me--that is nothing compared to what I was on, but it's another benzo. (for you alcoholic 12-steppers, like switching from scotch to brandy) I exhausted most of the others and almost died abusing Xanax and Vicodin and Norco together, given to me for endometriosis and fibroids, before I had my 3rd surgery.
Anyway---my question is, has anyone had experience with Suboxone? I have done so much research and been VERY proactive, and I read that taking benzos and Suboxone together have caused deaths. I also found out that a pt. of this doctor committed suicide/died (why and how I don't know) So, I'm back at "home" for now, no longer see that doctor. I don't feel right and I am supposed to start school in a month....I see a doc who prescribes the Suboxone and the Librium, and am seeing a new psychologist for the second time next week. I am wondering if this all has been a phase--I sufferred years and years of depression, suicidal thoughts, and severe anxiety, and since being "home" I seem to not be having so many panic attacks, and the depression is hard to fight, because i want so much to be with others, but I isolate and i isolate good. People aske me why aren't you married, you're so pretty, and you have such a good heart, but in my post in the new member forum, I haven't accomplished much, but I also have this HUGE fear of life, it's weird--I can go to a different area, fly on aplane to rehab, but can't get a life in my hometown--after livign up north for a year---I am starting from scratch now where I left off. How can I?
I'm a Heinz57 mental mess I feel. Tired if being tired and stresed. I started off with the Suboxone issue and ended about all I can say right now, tired and overwhelmed.