So lately my anxiety has been really high and uncomfortable. I haven't been sleeping well for the passed two weeks. So last night I took 3 extra klonopin before bed. I knew I shouldn't have but was surprised and how easy it was. I was very tempted to take more. A friend I was texting with convinced me not to and told me to call my T. Part of our safety plan is for me to reach out to her if I feel like I have intent. So I texted her and waited for the call back.

She wanted to assess if this was the start of an attempt and if she should send me to the hospital. We talked for a bit and she even talked to my wife. Then she called my pdoc and we did a conference call. Mind you this is all around 10:30 last night. So they both decided that it wasn't an attempt. That I was just trying to deal with the anxiety and sleep. They told my wife to take my pills away, which she hasn't, and to drink lots of water.

I am thankful for a treatment team that is willing to take time and assess the situation. Because getting dragged to the hospital over 3 extra klonopin would have sucked. My T is worried that as we were talking that the klonopin wasn't seeming to affect me. My pupils were pinpoints but I was acting fine. She is worried about me becoming addicted.

I always worry about following the safety plan because I fear that it will end up with me in the hospital.