hey t, well i was feeling pretty emotional last night about ending. some tears came again. i was reminded by someone on the forums that grief isn't all sadness and about the stages of grief i know there's 5 and so far i've experienced some anger and some sadness, i suppose there was a little denial thrown in there at first too because i sat there the first day we talked about it pretending i didn't feel anything... (eta this evening, I am feeling very settled about it and I know fully in my heart that it's right.)

in one sense it feels kinda wrong calling it 'grieving' when we are both still very much alive, but... it is, because it's a loss for both of us, for me it's a loss of a relationship that has been so profoundly healing and transforming. i don't know what it's like for you. but that's one of the questions i'll have for you next time. i have a bunch of questions actually about how we proceed from here. and i have some thoughts about how i would like it to go. i still want us to do a sand tray together. maybe we can do that next time while i ask all my questions. or maybe closer to the last session. i want to come up with some kind of ritual too, to mark and celebrate my transition to post-therapy. we have a lot to do over these last 6 or so sessions don't we?