i think you're on your way already with this Cy, identifying the exact feelings you have can lay out a path for you... so you want to respect women more.... begin by respecting them mmore.. you want more self-dignity... what is stopping you?

i dont want to sound know it all to you... i really want to help man... i think that in life we get these challenges, we're born into times and events we have little control over...

i do feel its part of our personal task and contribution to others as well as ourselves, to work through our personal issues... its a way of making the present a better place for all and while many may not agree, i believe its a responsibility we are obligated to face... for our kids sake...

and you are doing just that.. so, Kudos...

yep, its hard sorting it out, but, oh so important...

no pressure, but in you i can see a great mind with great potential (already pretty accomplished imo) and its not irony that you tagged yourself with such a name as "Cyrano" imo.. its the inner conflict you are doing this battle with and i know you may disagree, but there are men in history you can draw strength from and i also recommend that you use that tool.. its helped me a lot...

so, be yourself, communicate, open doors, knock down barriers... as you said, its not a pastime.. it matters...