On the subject of what therapists should do or be, here is a quote from Harry Stack Sullivan in The Psychiatric Interview. You may or may not agree. This was in the era when psychiatrists listened to people (and were male):

"Thus, insofar as it is possible -- and all of us fail now and then when one of our private interests is touched upon -- the psychiatrist remembers that his role is that of an expert. He tries to keep to this role, no matter what attractive cul-de-sacs the patient may open up to him; if he does take an interest in the interview other than that of a person who is very hard at work in the most difficult of labors -- namely, understanding who somebody else is, what ails him, and what one can do that will be wise and durable in its results -- he recognizes it and regrets it. From beginning to end, to the best of his ability, the psychiatrist tries to avoid being involved as a person -- even as a dear and wonderful person -- and keeps to the business of being an expert; that is, he remains one who, theoretically and in fact, deals with his patients only because he [the psychiatrist] has had the advantage of certain unique training and experience which make him able to help them."

(Starting on page 33 of the Norton paperback edition which I have.)