I think your T has similar feelings to yours? You say you really like/need your T but then call him and tell him you never want to see him again. What is he supposed to do with that? He has to honor what you say, take it seriously and try to help you learn that you and what you say and feel are a "team".

Have you ever said to your T, "Gee, I really like you and get a lot out of our relationship"? If not, how is he supposed to know?

I would work on seeing that your T does like you enough to take you seriously! Not everyone else (our parents) always does. Look at you and your wife's interactions and how similar her reaction to you was what you were feeling was happening with your T? But it wasn't about your wife for you there and your T's not calling might not have been about you? It probably was not that he didn't care but had some tangles in his own life and just wasn't able to respond in a way you could see looked like what you wanted to see?