Quote:
Originally Posted by DodgersMom
i am sorry you are feeling down, that is tough and hope you got some rest. i struggle myself with fighting the urge to email. its hard sometimes.
i hope you are doing ok but feel free to message me if you ever need to chat. willing to listen
hugs and good luck with your test tomorrow
|
Thank you. I managed not to email, and I still haven't but the urge is still there. She doesn't mind but it's for my own good to try to settle myself. I had an EMG. It wasn't as bad as I thought even though they give you short electric shocks and put needles in your body! Actually, having my teeth cleaned at the dentist was worse!
Quote:
Originally Posted by ScarletPimpernel
No one but yourself is the answer, unfortunately.
|
Yes, you're right. I don't know why it's taken me so many years to learn that fact. Probably because I've never lived by myself until the last 2 years.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Waterbear
Hi Rainbow. I can hear your sadness. It sounds like you are realising a lot, and that the truth is a hard one to realise. It is a hard one to realise, that what we so desperately crave, does not exist. That may be different for different people, but for me, this is true and it hurts.
I am not sure that you know exactly what it is that you search for, but it sounds similar to what I search for. A deep connection. Someone who knows you inside out, is there for you all of the time, has your best interests at heart, includes you in everything that they do etc etc.
This may be way off base, and ignore it if it is.
I think that Scarlet is right, unfortunately. We are the answer. We are all that we have, and that realisation is an incredibly difficult one.
I hope you can find some peace, because I think that good things come to those who are. I am thinking of you.
|
Waterbear, you are exactly correct and not off base at all. A deep connection is something I especially crave because I didn't have that with my H. I have gradually learned I can have it with friends, but my T is the person I've felt the deepest connection to. I don't know if a partner can fulfill all of those needs. I don't think so. My mother gave me some of that, but not even she included me in everything she did, obviously. I'm searching for the "impossible dream". It's so naïve to think that a T can be that person, and intellectually I knew that all the time, but the reality still hurts, over and over. Thank you for your good wishes for me. I wish the same for you.
Quote:
Originally Posted by satsuma
I think sleep is a very very important thing. It's so hard to cope without enough sleep.
I hope you can get more sleep. If you're not able to, perhaps this is an issue to take to T or to your GP?
|
Thank you. I do feel better when I get at least 7 hours of sleep a night. It's my own fault because I stay up until midnight and wake up early. My T told me about a great app, Insight Timer, that has wonderful meditations. I've been trying them to help me fall asleep.