Last Nov/Dec I experienced a psychotic mixed state. I alternated between euphoria with delusions and hallucinations and suicidal depression with delusions. When depressed my suicidal plans were very delusional and grandiose. I also heard voices and felt I was in 'unreality'. It was a horrible experience so my heart goes out to you. At the time I was IP for safety. It took weeks to bring me back to reality.
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Bipolar 1 with psychotic features
PTSD
"Phew! For a minute there I lost myself."
'Karma Police' by Radiohead
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