Gutted with T.
After a couple of messy ruptures over him not really being/feeling present or focused for me, and then 3 months ago, him not being there for me when things were really bad, I feel like he's let me down again.
Last time (3mths ago) he just didn't respond at all when I emailed and texted for help with feeling suicidal (I was very tentative and respectful). I plucked up the courage to go back and told him how hurt and let down I felt. He basically said he should have been there for me and it was ok to contact him.
About a month ago, I brought it up again and asked what was reasonable to expect/ask for from him, in terms of support. He said he would absolutely be fine with me texting him and he would call me back, no matter what day of the week.
This morning, after a hell night. I emailed him first thing to ask if he had any spaces (I never do that). I heard nothing, so I texted again after lunch. Still nothing. At 3pm he finally texted back and said he didn't have any spare appt time and was there something I needed by phone?
It all just felt like too little, too late. I just don't want to go back. I feel like he wasn't there for me, yet again.
Am I being unreasonable? No, we didn't put any parameters around 'response time, but virtually the entire working day went by, and every hour feels like a lifetime when you're in that space..: