I know I need to change things in my life, but I'm resisting it, or more like just passively letting time slip away. I've been living back in my hometown for about three and a half years now and am tired of it. It's tiny, narrow minded, and confining. I don't have all the independence I want, I live at my parents house they are gone for several weeks at a time often because they are retired and my Dad built a place in the mountains of New Mexico. They come back usually only for a few days, maybe a week or two then are gone again for two or three weeks, maybe even longer. But when they are here I feel cooped up. I also can't really have the house the way I want it. You'll probably think it's stupid, but I have a personal library of over 1,000 books. I want them all up on shelves so I can find one when I need/want it, and because I like the look of a house full of books. So I want to move out. The way I see it I have three options 1) get an apartment, 2) buy a small house of my own 3) build a tiny house or at least small house. If I get an apartment I'm concerned that I'm throwing money away renting. The last two options make me feel tied down, other than the fact that maybe a tiny house could be put on a trailer of some sort or made so that it could be disassembled and then reassembled fairly easily. Which segues into the nuclear option if you will. I hate the thought that this place (my hometown) is the last place I will ever live. It literally scares me. So I want to move away, maybe to someplace urban, maybe even to a big city, like New York or Chicago. But what if I get tired of that after a year or two? Or, what if I fail at my job there? Maybe the thought of having roots someplace actually triggers my anxiety. I guess what I'm asking is has anyone been in a similar situation? Is there anything in this that anyone else can relate too? Also why am I resisting picking an option and just rolling with it? Why do I resist taking action in my life?