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Originally Posted by BayBrony
I guess maybe your T thinks ending is somehow necessary to complete your healing?? Otherwise, I don't know why you HAVE to end seeing her. I mean so what that you pay her??
My T has said that as long as she is practicing I can continue to see her..i don't care that i pay her. I think being abused as a kid is no different from having a chronic illness or something. So i need ongoing care ?? So what??
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I think T must think I'm more capable than I think I am. I don't know if I NEED ongoing care; I just WANT it. I don't know if I'll ever feel ready to leave. So doesn't that mean I didn't solve my attachment issues? I understand why I want T, and I understand why I can't have her. I think realizing she can't be "that person" to me, is a huge step, so maybe I'm moving forward at my own pace.
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Originally Posted by SilentMelodee
You don't HAVE to give her up now, and I don't think she's asking you to. Spacing out sessions is one thing, but quitting therapy is something separate. I think the general consensus is that it's OUR decision to end therapy, unless something unhealthy is going on. so if you don't want to space sessions, don't. Tell her you aren't ready, you will let her know when you are, and kindly ask her to drop the subject. She works FOR YOU. So if you want to continue seeing her once a week, stick up for yourself in that!
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She hasn't said I have to end now, but think about it. I don't want to space out sessions either unless my T thinks it's best for me.
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Originally Posted by Pennster
Rainbow - I feel a little confused sometimes about the pressure you feel to stop therapy. There are lots of people on here who have been in therapy for years. In reading here for many years at really obvious you've done a lot of good work and made great progress. I think it's totally possible that some day you might feel stronger within yourself and decide you don't need a weekly session, but I'm not sure if focusing on that before you're ready is doing much more than making you anxious? I don't know. It sounds like you are still going through a lot.
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I sort of agree with you but I've been in therapy for over 25 years, maybe 30. I stopped counting. That was with 5 or 6 Ts. I know my T will tell she's not pushing me, but I have this feeling she is. She said she is not retiring yet, but she will at some point. If my Self were leading my parts, I probably wouldn't need T. I feel confused too, Penster! I think it's because often I've felt I want to be in therapy for the feelings I get from the T, and that seems unhealthy to be still doing.