Sounds that you are pretty confident that she is not suitable for the type of work you need to do. In that case I think you did a right thing although I still think it would have been better to reach a common agreement with T in this sense. However, if the T is not able to admit that your stuff is way over her head then achieving this common agreement about your need to find someone else (and her possibly helping you to find this someone else) might be unrealistic.

Based on the many stories I've read in this forum about people getting stuck with their incompetent therapists I think that being avoidant has some clear advantages - you are actually able to go away when you don't get what you need.

You are not asking for advice but based on my own experience you might want to look for therapists with contemporary psychoanalytic background - these folks are most likely to be familiar and comfortable working with transference and attachment issues and expect the work to be focussed on the relationship between you and T.