WARNING - Tough and existential material!




I've read over the net about how AD's can mess your brain up and damage it, and I've been thinking killing myself is the best recovery option since I want an ideal brain with ideal potential, and something has been limiting me - my parents, the AD's, even after I stopped taking them as I am highly concerned of.
I read where people feel they didn't get the chance to mature after taking AD's when they were teens. Oh what a coincidence - I feel the same!

So what on Earth am I supposed to do about this? I want dreams to come true, I'm sick of being in moderate standards because I want to compensate for what I've been through on an emotional and mental manner.
I want to actually create great music, but am unable to right now.
I want to actually have a loving relationship with a woman, but I can't. I mean, you have to be emotionally mature to have great relationship, but how is that possible if it's been hindered by AD's?

I want to believe I can recover from all this but I'm starting to think suicide is the best way to restart my brain, to hope to be reborn, perhaps even in a better family.