|
Did you feel less special and/or more normal when you were diagnosed with BP or did you feel more special and/or less normal?
I felt less special and more normal, which is a good thing overall even though (nor surprisingly) I used to feel more special when manic, which, even though it wasn't true, was hard to come to terms with at the time.
I'm technically not diagnosed with BP though and it makes me feel more of an outcast. So it's a bit of a double-edged sword.
__________________
Mania kills cells. Brain cells die. Memories become more reduced conceptually, making more efficient use of limited means. Memories shape our reality. Our memories are more or less split in two by abstractions, conceptual reductions. Mood states with memories, concepts, attached. Memories of pain and those of joy. It causes instability, changeability. Fearing that will leave an emptiness between pain and joy and a greater divide.
See Me, Feel Me, Touch Me, Heal Me.
|