I'm sorry you're feeling so bad. Remember, depression always lies to us and tells us things to make us feel worse. You're a good person and always offering support to others. Keep fighting, don't give up. I know it's tiresome and the struggle seems never ending but you make a difference to so many people. The depression is cyclical so you will eventually cycle out. Hold on and again, keep fighting, keep posting here and reaching out. I hope the darkness lifts soon. Feel better!