I slept about an hour, I should eat but don't want to.
Maybe I will eat something and then go out to drink some beers and smoke in the park...
How messed up is that my goal what makes me get up and live is to go out drink and smoke.
...
And my "biggest achievement" was quitting smoking seven years ago....
Well, I screwed that up now. Not smart because my asthma might come back. But now I don"t care, I need this to survive.