Yes, it is confusing and painful but in the end, it is better to be with a professional t who has appropriate boundaries and doesn't talk in riddles (thinking of when she told you, 'you know she and I have more in common than hair style').

Have you made progress in finding another t? It took me time to find a new t after I had one abruptly drop me after I called in crisis (one I saw said she was 'afraid' to work with me!). A professional t will help you process the terrible ending with the previous t.