Thanks all for hearing me out as I rambled and ranted. Today's a little bit of a better day. I still kind of feel the same way, but I'm more preoccupied, which is a good thing. It's when I am left without much to do when my thoughts wander. Family triggers me lately as well. I love them, but I clash with my mother and brother frequently. Maybe it's something to do with my mood swings and medication.....but then again, it's always been that way with them. It's just more intense when I'm going through an episode or bouts of depression/signs of mania. I know I need to seek some kind of comfort within myself.....but it's easier said than done. Especially when people seem to follow me and haunt me. Oh well. It's hard to get away sometimes.