I am thinking you would be wise to turn your back on this "man," who appears to have been nothing more than a sperm donor to you and your baby.
The decision to have pain control during childbirth is yours and yours alone, and he has NO right to dictate anything regarding this, even if he wanted to be there full time. It's your body, your baby. What an assinine statement! to say that he will not be present if you chose to have pain control! Let HIM go thru the pains of childbirth and say such a thing! It's outrageous and cruel.
Being pregnant is an emotional and tender time, when you deserve support. He is giving you "not playing house with you" instead and this has to be upsetting. Not good for you to hear...for you or your baby.
Love,
Patty