Hello hello, Must!

Sorry to hear you're going through such a rough patch, but it sounds to me like there is a lot going for you here.

For one, you are able to realize the reality that, once you are at work you are fine. You are even putting to rest the irrational thoughts of you dying at work. It seems like you do a good thing at your job, especially because you feel that you do well there. You exhibit the sort of self-confidence a patient would want to see in a healthcare setting.

So what's the issue? I don't think you have this subconscious notion that you can fall back on your parents because you are aware of how finite their assistance is. How is your relationship with them, by the way? Perhaps, as another poster mentioned, you could be due for a career change? You could be anxious about going because maybe there is something else you'd rather be doing. Maybe something from your past that you never got the chance to pursue because you found yourself working in the busy healthcare field. Speaking of the business of that field, does the chaotic nature of the workplace ever get to you? It could possibly affect you in ways you may not be aware of.

I like what another post said about getting anxiety and getting anxious because that's exactly what this sounds like. In the morning before work have some sort of ritualistic affirmation to say to yourself before leaving for work. Just tell yourself what you told us here, that you will be fine once you're there.