I showed T where I had SI'ed on my arm this week. I had never actually showed him any cuts before. I started to roll my sleeve down and he stopped me. He told me to leave it up because he did not want me to have to feel ashamed in front of him. He wanted me to know that this was a part of me, a part that he can look at, and he does not think I am disgusting in any way.

He asked me where I had been today, and if I was going to a party. I told him, no, that I had just come from my internship. He said, "Well you look really nice-- is that okay? That I tell you that you look nice?"

OMG of course it's okay. It was the first time he has EVER commented on my physical appearance in the two + years that I have been seeing him. It felt really nice. I told him how much it meant to me.

Then he said, "Remember the first year you were here and you were going to a Christmas party after session? You were all decked out then, too-- you were wearing some type of fur collar thing or something puffy." LOL-- something puffy?? I couldn't believe he remembered.

Then we talked a bit more about the boxer shorts dream-- also because I had another dream a couple of nights ago in which the same thing happened, only he was fully clothed this time.

We discussed the whole Christmas thing, as I will be in NY. He gave me two times in which I can call him for a phone session. He said, "I'm looking forward to talking to you. I'm looking forward to connecting to you."

Our next session will be Wednesday, only 8 days away-- at the new office. At this point I will be officially transitioning to the new place.

At the end of the session I started to get a bit sad and was feeling sort of lost. He said, "Hey... you know how whenever you internalize I tell you to look at me right in the eyes?" I said yes.... He said, "Well look right now." We locked eyes and he said, "Now you remember this." And we just looked at each other for a couple of seconds.

Then he goes, "Or you can picture me in my boxers-- whichever you want."

And we both cracked up and there was the session....

I have never felt so safe and so accepted before.