Hello,

I noticed that I am unable to determine the right way of action when encountering negative conflict with others. Example would be whether someone yells at me due to my fault or my lack of efficacy to perform certain task or even when I am not to blame at all. Especially experiencing how someone yells at me or calls me names without knowing me well leaves me at a loss, feeling vulnerable and lose self-esteem because I feel I could "fight back" to defend my respect as a person. Something does not let me respond with same negativity or respond physically...

After situation is over, I keep replaying that scenario from memory and think how I would respond, which usually yell back or grab offender by throat and threaten him. I can forget about whole thing next morning but it seems that I have developed anxiety and panic attacks due to these events as they happened in my life and now it is in my subconscious mind. If conflict happened at local shop, next time that I plan going there, I already start feeling uneasy and anxious. When I get out of my house I mostly feel tense and cannot be as comfortable as I am at home.

Is anyone here who experiences this? How do you cope in such situations? It seems these situations are the root cause that affected my self-esteem and confidence.

Thanks.