I'm sorry to hear you are struggling so much. Don't hesitate to go IP if you have to - even a quick stay can make a big difference.

I know you want to stay out of IP though if possible, so what are some healthy activities you can do to help your mood? It can be something as small as taking a relaxing bubble bath or doing a quick workout, taking care of your mind and body is so important. Feel free to PM me if you ever want to chat or just vent. I hope you are feeling better soon.