You figured out your family of origin hasn't got much they can or will offer you. So no use looking for satisfaction there.

Who supports you? Or do you support yourself?

When you come from a bad home situation, the main thing to do is to get out of it. That means you got to get trained for some kind of job that will provide you an income to live off of. Solving the problems of getting educated/ trained and employed will indirectly enlighten you about relationships. That's what most of the people in the world are busy doing. If you're not concerned with those things then you're not going to have much in common with most people.