Have you ever been diagnosed with being on the autism spectrum ( higher functioning used to be called Aspergers'). If not it might be worth looking into to know whether that may be at the base of your issues. At least if they check for it you would know one way or the other if that is or isn't the cause for the issues you are struggling with. The main behavioral issues with that are the inability to emotionally connect & also difficulties communicating with others.....both are issues you say you struggle with so it might be worthwhile to have that possibility checked out.

If that is the Issue underlying your problems at least then they would know how to help you to the best of your own abilities.