Hm, that's a good thought. (And I bet both H and MC would like it, because they both like sports metaphors.)

But that does fit into the fact that I tend to think of myself as inferior in the relationship since I make less money as a freelancer since having our daughter (and with H getting a promotion). And H does occasionally sort of throw that in my face, while at the same time complaining we don't have enough money. And then when I take on extra work, he says I'm doing too much. It's like I can't win...

Plus I still feel guilty about the huge mistake I made a year and a half ago, even though H has said he's forgiven me. So maybe I don't feel like I deserve some stuff...