Do you find that your self-perceived 'flaws' and 'shortcomings' have taken on a life of their own and taken such precedence within your state of consciousness that they have become your overriding identity (sense of self) - and that this has had the effect of overshadowing and drowning out all the aspects of you that you that you do accept and are at peace with?

I'm not trying to mince words here - but I find that individuals (at one point or another, myself included) have a difficult time connecting with the concept of 'self-love'... I find it's both more accurate and more relatable to instead replace the word 'love' with acceptance... Self-love becomes Self-Acceptance... When you fully accept yourself, there is no internal resistance going on inside you. No fragmenting of your identity (sense of self) into parts which are accepted and parts which are rejected. Make self-acceptance your goal - and when that fully comes to fruition, you will feel at peace and content! There will no longer be that pervasive sense of internal discord and turmoil that you had formerly become so accustomed to.

I will recommend two of my favorites books, books whose content really spoke to me. Now they may not speak to you, or they may in fact do so... It doesn't hurt to explore....

The Power Of Now (Eckhart Tolle)
The Untethered Soul (Michael Singer)