Welcome to PsychCentral (PC), Flyinhi!

I would get a therapist and check out the reasons why you feel the ways you do about sex, what in how you raised has "fed" your desire, and think of ways to deal with it. I like that you were able to focus on other things, education and career. Do you have problems with having sex with your husband, "more"? Would that help at all? I would first try to stay out of situations where the problem comes up? It could be too that you have a sexual addiction of some kind and that could be worked on with a therapist too.

Good luck!