Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopingtrying
I recently found an audio version of one of those books:
https://forums.psychcentral.com/step...lf-esteem.html
I grew up in a very small town myself--I kept my dreams alive by reading all of the time. I read fantasy constantly--before the movie Star Wars came out I read the novel (Luke Skywalker leaves his planet for a higher calling); The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings (both hobbits undertake perilous journeys); Kidnapped (a boy who is shanghaied to become a sailor and sees the world); etc. etc.
You may have to figure out how to relocate somehow. It may be an impossible dream but it might be the only way. I served in the military for a while and lived in Okinawa, Japan, and Hawaii for a while. Being sent so far away forced me to leave everything behind. Living in another country is a mixed experience (there is so much to explore but sometimes you are homesick) but it is so much better than feeling "stuck" as I know you are currently feeling. In the meantime--books can be a great escape when you have free time or are unable to sleep. I still read everyday...... |
Hi again! As you wrote I started to read the book " six pillars of self esteem".You are totally right. I am stuck in my life. This week I applied to the job that I mentioned on my previous posts. I was called to interview and maybe after one month I will be accepted. I was so happy that I am going to improve myself and to help my family financially. As I said still if I had another chance I wouldn't apply for that job but I don't want to work on the public works that my father finds me. Accidentally, I heard my father and mother talking. My father was talking to my mom that he will find me a suitable job from september so that I can work on that job until the end of my life. When I heard that I started crying. Can you believe? My mom said that I will do that job for two months and after that I can get hired from september on the job that my father will find me. My brain was going to explode. After that when I was alone with my mom, I started yelling at my mom.....she knows that I want to be accepted on that job(I have to pass interviews....one month training period and so on) ....how they can decide for me to leave the job when I am on the way for interview? As I see they plan to find me the job that will be guareenteed for all my life...so there will be no risk to lose my job...they will force me to marry and to live near them. This is not what I want. I cried and told my mom that I have applied to that job only to avoid my fathers will to find me a job. I cried and told everything but as usual she said that I have to talk to my father and solve the problem. My father knows that I don't want to live here but I couldn't say anything because I am jobless and moneyless. I found job and he still forces me for something else. As I mentioned above I have lost my first job because he tried to solve the problem...now if I will be accepted then again I will lose my job because again he is trying to solve the problem.....I cannot sleep and I dont have power to explain him the reasons because literally he doesn't understand. He is too strict and when he wants to do something he will do no matter what I do and what I say. My plans were to put up with my new job if I will be accepted ....work hard collect money...pass english tests and leave this country. I will apply either for master degree or for job.I want to see new experiences... then If I will find my love of my life I will get married. I cant live and work and marry here for the sake of my parents....nothing helps I started to think that my parents will not let me go abroad alone...they can only let me if I will get married.....