This is probably going to sound silly, like a toddler throwing her toys out of the pram.. :P But I'm really struggling with this issue and need to deal with it..

I REALLY loathe having to take care of myself. Going to bed early feels SO boring! I can't be bothered to cook for myself.. Exercise, God no!!

BUT.. Somehow I need to get myself to start doing all these things - because not doing them is making me ill, and that means I'm not able to do the things I really enjoy! I just don't know why it's so bloody hard.. I think I may have internalized my dad hating me having needs I felt I was a nuisance.. I really want to let go of that..!!!