In a way, I have. I simply am choosing a bit more honorable way of going about it.

If I can't find a job by this fall, I decided to tap into student loans on top of my Pell grant that I'm currently receiving to cover all of my living expenses for the next year or so and invest everything that I actually earn aside from maybe $100 or so that I put into savings on my online business that I want to live off of.

I've decided that I'm going all in. The fear of being alone and homeless and the ruthlessness behind wanting to win no matter the cost shall be what drive me. I will keep fighting, both as a student by day, and a business owner by night. If I become homeless, I will live in a van because who needs a house or apartment anyways? As long as I have a laptop and hands I can keep working.

I will turn my hobbies and passions into an income or die trying. What's the point of living if one is miserable all of the time? I'm done. I'm angry. I'm no longer going to be this weak pathetic excuse for a human that I've been most of my life. It's time to be a man for once.

All of my experience up to this point has prepared me for such a trial. It's time for me to suck it up and take action.