OK so I was nervous to begin with because this was the last session for two weeks. I lost track of time and left my house 15 minutes late. I was frantic. I drove like a zillion mph to get there and got stuck in traffic getting off the parkway. I arrived for my session about 13 minutes late. I AM NEVER LATE FOR THERAPY!!!

I walked in the door and T said, "You're never late." I started blabbing about how I lost track of time, left late, and got stuck in traffic.

I was clearly nervous and T reminded me to breathe and we breathed together for a minute. I commented that I had come in like a tornado.

Then I began to tell him how I have been having such a hard time with my new medications and I how I spoke with Pdoc, who was reducing the dosage.

With that, I started getting this head rush (one of the effects I've been experiencing) and all of a sudden I felt like my face was on fire. I said to T, "Is my face red?" He nods. I pulled my sweater off because luckily I had on a short sleeve t-shirt under it. I said I needed a glass of water. I went out to the waiting room,(where the water cooler is) came back in with my water and proceeded to SPILL IT ALL OVER T'S SIDE TABLE. (yes, the table right next to his chair).

By then I was really rattled. I started muttering, "OMG OMG OMG" and started grabbing tissues and blotting up the water. T sent me to get another drink and said he would clean up. He said not to worry.

When I came back in I sat on the couch and said, "I need a seat belt." I said to T, "You've never seen me this rattled have you?" I was not feeling well at all and he looked at me and said, "you're ok."

For the remainder of the session we just chatted. He told me about his plans for the holiday with his family, the parties he would go to, the presents he had to buy. I told him about the party I was planning and who I invited. I said, "this is the weirdest session." He said, "I don't want to stir anything up because we will be having a break and you are not feeling well. I thought I would use this time just to connect with you and share some of my life." sigh

When the session was over I gave him some cookies I had baked.

Shessh, therapy is never what I expect. NEVER.