Yeah, it sucks when it doesn't seem like the professionals can do anything to help. I'm fortunate that most of the medications they gave me actually worked. I get frustrated because most of the treatment available is in group format, and I can't handle being among groups of people and having to discuss my personal mental health situation. I told my therapist they can't make me waive my right to confidentiality in order to receive treatment. I kind of went off on him. I'm a paralegal and can throw down some law if I must. So he's arranging for my insurance to cover DBT treatment with an individual therapist because I am "not suitable for the group format," which probably sounds like I'll tear everyone apart with my teeth.

I remember feeling really disappointed and confused when I needed substance abuse treatment and found out how limited my options were. Treatment meant rehab, meetings, therapy, and medications. I don't know what I expected because in hindsight it was pretty comprehensive, but I just didn't like my options. I didn't like the process. I didn't feel like they were listening to me, and I didn't believe any of it would help. But I was desperate, so I did it, and I'm still sober.

I've had to recommit to that willingness over and over. I repeatedly get to a place where I resist the treatment that's offered to me. I have to work to override that impulse. Obviously I'm still stubborn, hence the "not suitable for the group format" thing, but if I can grit my teeth and tolerate the treatment I'm given, it usually does help.

What options are they giving you as far as treating the depression?