This post is not intended to cause offence, it's obviously just my view, I feel your pain, and sadly, feel I can relate. It's unnecessary to go into detail, but, my oldest friend and I now don't speak. You don't deserve to be so harshly treated, but, this is what people with m/h issues can do, turn their unreasonable behaviour around, so that everything is your fault. It is wrong and unfortunately, depression brings out the very worst in a person. This maybe not what you think at all, I can only add, if you feel you deserve better....chances are you probably do.

Good luck, take no crap and take care of you x