Warning: woo woo stuff ahead!

*blissful sigh* home from my shamanic clearing session. E is quite gifted at this work. I feel so much better now. She asked what brought me there and I explained briefly the current goings-on with t and my feelings of guilt and shame around it and stuff. Then I pulled a card (it was Intuition, and it said something about how I need to work on not letting my doubt about life overrule my intuition. I'm all yeah ya think?!) Then we called on my power animal (panther) and one of t's (owl) and then she drummed and we journeyed about this whole thing and I focused first on releasing guilt and shame, then on welcoming new allies love and compassion and sending those out to t, and to myself too, .and on smoothing the current between us. Then she smudged with sage and I said several times "I release guilt and shame" and together we invited it to leave, she opened the door and we again invited it to leave. Ahhh. Then she did some Reiki, which left me feeling this blissful peace. After, she told me what she got from panther and owl during the journey, she said that Panther gave her a sense that on T's part there is some pride involved here, some wounded pride, and that he wanted to make sure that neither of us stay 'stuck' here, that if/when I do choose to see T again, we don't rehash the bad stuff. That we both see what happened as a gift, that will allow both of us to grow, and that he wants us to allow each other to move forward. It was very powerful. ETA: oh, during the Reiki she used 3 rose quartz crystals, and gave me one of them at the end. I will keep it with me all the time as a reminder of inviting love and compassion to be my allies in the place of guilt and shame. And if I do go see T one more time, I think I want to give it to her.