So it's 5 and you know it I'm in bed. Tv isn't on as usual. I'm very much considering taking an ambien and go to sleep till tomorrow. Funny thing is I don't have feelings of my past, how I've failed or how I look. I just don't want to do anything. Not even my martial arts which I miss so much. Part of me is using my bad as an excuse but I know it won't get better till I strengthen it up. Why can't I get out of bed. I have my pdoc appointment Wednesday hopefully she will get something going for me.