Hi all,

While I suffer from mental illness myself, my ex-girlfriend has just recently been diagnosed with BPD and I am trying to familiarize myself with its patterns in order to be of better support to her now that we are back in each other's lives.

Something she very frequently talks about is her unreliability.

It is common for her to not respond to texts of mine for a week or sometimes even two before being able to have a full on conversation. We've been through multiple breakups, won't speak for months on end, then she'll whip back into my life very emotionally and suddenly and confess her love before leaving very abruptly again (sometimes even that same day, week, or month!)

I have spoken to her about this and explain how it hurts me and how I feel disposable to her rather than a cornerstone in her life, even though I know she loves me very much. Whenever I bring up the topic, she constantly speaks of her unreliability and how it is thoroughly unintentional, but a pattern that runs throughout her social relationships. Funny enough though, she seems to be in constant contact with her friends, so I wonder if this especially hits intimate relationships?

Whenever we go through these off cycles, I do not contact her and giver her as much space as she needs rather than calling her again or bumping my last text. Is this the correct thing to do? I don't know where it quite stems from so I'm not sure

I was just wondering if anyone can point me in the correct direction of what she could mean by this. I want to treat her the best I can and I wish to learn as much as absolutely possible to be a support and keep her comfortable

Thank you!