You would regret it 100% if you didn't do another session. I feel like you are putting SO much pressure on yourself to be done with therapy. I am confused, because it seems to be coming mostly from you, yet you seem to be in real turmoil over it.

I know I don't know any details about what happened in the session where you said "awful" things to her...but, I don't think it means you NEED to end it right now. I don't know. It all seems very complicated, but just from an outsider's point of view--I can't see your T kicking you out of therapy all together. I maybe am confused on this email you sent after that session, and got the impression she thought you were done?

Anyway, I wouldn't cancel it.