Because of the recent craziness in my life, I'm seeing my T 4 times this week. I spent the first session just relating the events of that night.

We spent some time today starting to deal with my feelings surrounding what's been going on and discussing how I'm going to deal with the rest of the week and the near future. I told him that I wish my husband had just killed me because I don't want to deal with any of this right now. I heard him sigh. I have no idea what that sigh means. Is he frustrated with me? Does he think I'm just attention seeking? Sometimes I wish I could look at him so I could see his facial expressions. I just want him to know that I'm so overwhelmed right now. I told him that I'm scared he is going to abandon me and I feel so ridiculously stupid admitting that to him, like I'm a scared child. I don't know why all the abandonment fears have come rushing to the foreground right now, but they have.