Are you 18? Because it sounds to me like you do need to move on away from them… start up your own life. And get a job so you can begin to support yourself since obviously they are not doing to much to help. I recommend staying with your grandmother since she doesnt get angry at you. Living with her provides you with some plce to stay rent free. Does she cook or do you know how too? Because i reckon you begin to learn. Cmon although i dont know you look at the little and good things in life. It's not your fault your parents turned out the way they did. You may feel it, but you cant control their actions just by being you. I was adopted i know the pain of knowing that i have a father who was an abusive alcohlic i say was because i dont know him. So now i live with my adoptive parents. But my mom and i arent close and its taken me 12 years to realize its not ALL my fault in fact some people just get all the bad luck.