thanks everyone for the lovely feedback :3 as of now my hocd seems to come and go when anxiety hits it's hardest. It's incredibly difficult and I have nights where all I want to do is cry and just admit I'm in denial or I'm gay or bi ect.. but even if I do admit those things I still feel terrible and guilty as I know that's not true either-it's just really hard. I miss the old me before hocd came into my life. I was really carefree and confident on who I was and now I just have no idea anymore, I just feel empty.