Hey,
I'm 19 and suffer with depression. I've never been diagnosed, but will discuss the reason soon, but I know I have depression. I rarely have bad days recently but a year ago it was bad all the time. There wasn't a day I didn't want to kill myself and I cut my arms and legs every day. This went on from about the beginning of 2016 to late 2016, that's when I started to get better and I stopped cutting in November 2016 (though I'm still tempted when I have my bad days). One of the reasons that stopped me cutting was that one day my mum saw the scars on my thigh and my parents had a talk with me. They said that they didn't want me to get professional help from a gp (doctor in England) as they didn't want it to go on my record. They still couldn't understand why somedays I just felt down and how one some days I would be sensitive to everything and anything regardless of how little the issue was and how I could get so angry so easily.

When I have my bad days now I have issues talking to my boyfriend about them because they're so hard to describe. Though he's had anxiety himself he's said he wants to help me got to therapy and try to get better but I just can't get the idea of what my parents said out of my head. And when I'm home on bad days my parents just get angry at me for being miserable or being down. It's sounds silly but they moved around my room today and when I got home I was so angry as I was already feeling really down and having one of my bad days that I just got mad. I can't help it. They then get angry at me for being sensitive.
I want to talk to them about it but I just can't. I can't tell them that it kills me on the inside when my mum *****es about me to my dad (I can hear downstairs from my bedroom so I do hear this) and that when they yell and me or being down or mad it makes me get even worse.

Long story to get down to the question but just felt it was relevant. Basically, how do I approach this topic with them without hysterically crying in front of them (because this will happen) and how can I best describe my feelings to them when I don't even know how I feel myself.

Thanks