gina,
this is just what happened to me...it may not apply for you. But these are some ideas.
1) I got an attorney from the get go. I was in no mental condition to handle everything myself and to keep it moving along. I always had someone to call to ask about my case.
2) Instead of sending pdoc and tdoc my paperwork and expecting them to fill it out, I made 45 minute appointments with each of them and sat with them while they filled it out. They were able to ask me questions while they filled it out and I could take it right with me to turn in.
3) I never had to see a judge, but I did have to have an evaluation by a psychologist. One key thing she asked was "Whose idea was this to get disability?" Apparently, if it was your pdoc's idea, it was much more valid than if it was your idea. (Don't ask me why.)
4) I was teaching third grade at the time and was off on a leave. I was psychotic and seeing things. I told the lady "My biggest fear is seeing something that's not real in front of the kids. I'm afraid I might panic." This seemed to throw her a bit.
5) I have heard over and over that you really need a long history of records with both pdocs and tdocs. Hospitalizations also help. I had all that, but don't know if it's true or not.
6) I also heard that having a long work history is a plus. Don't know if that is true.
7) Also heard being older makes you much more likely to be approved. (I was 55.)
I was approved in three months. Since I didn't get a lot of back money, the attorney was pretty cheap.
We were also incredibly lucky when someone told us about the private disability insurance that my school district carried. I also qualified for that.

It can be really tough, I know, but it went okay for me. It actually was scary how fast and smoothly it went. Just made me realize how sick I was. Not a good feeling.