((((((((((((((( fuzzyiestwuzzyiestbearsyiest )))))))))))))))))))
We all have times in our lives when we look back and wish we had done things differently. As we move ahead, we learn, as we learn, we see how our past actions have affected others and ourselves. This is a huge process that we all go through. They say hindsight is 20/20. What we take from the new knowledge is what we have to apply to the here and now and in the future. We may not be able to change the past, but we can choose to learn and apply that which we have learned to better our lives and our relationships.
Part of learning of past mistakes is to realize we are all human and make them. None of us is perfect. Forgiving oneself is very important in that process too.
You have much love and support here and I hope you are finding it IRL too. There isn't one amoung us that doesn't deserve it and that includes you my friend!!

sabby