Hey. So the day didn't really improve. Bleh. Laid on the couch half awake listening to some three days grace and spendIng a lot of mental energy cleaning my house and doing chores in my head, while not actually accomplishing anything in the actual world. Oh well. Not every day is gonna be one to be especially proud of. One can't always be a fuucking hero.

But I think the fact that I can still experience crappy days and bad moods and it does not always have to be indicative of symptoms, but rather evidence that I am human and that I can actually feel is kind of reassuring. Feeling crappy without having the irrational urge to off myself playing in the background of my mind is sort of a novel experience. And now I am rambling and tAlking in circles up my asss.

Also, I am lying in bed looking up at the ceiling and I keep thinking I see a moth flying around inside of the screwed in bulb cover but when I look again the shape is in the same spot and I think I am seeing shiit. Like when u stare at a spot on the wall too long and start to think it's a bug and it appears to move but it is just your eyes? Or maybe that sucker is alive inside my light and is fuucking with me. Idk why I care. Or why I am sharing it here. Sorry. Have a good night. I suppose I could still salvage the enveing and get a second wind and clean up my messy place. Or not. Have a good night.

Omg- the moth inside the light just moved again while I was watching it. I'm not imagining it. But the weird thing is it moves and then keeps returning to the EXAct same spot- totally freaking me out! I need to get up from lying here- I am starting to lose it. Lol.