Thank you again for contributing your thoughts. Again some good points have been made. I'm still struggling trying to not think about this woman still.
I made my wife a small dinner before we had plans for the evening. Wasn't quite the romantic meal I would have liked but there wasn't time for that.
She seemed to appreciate it and I gave her the gifts I had made for her and she appreciated them as well.
We went out for the night and we disagreed on something on the way home and had a small argument, not really even a fight, it was very minor but I think part of it was neither of us wanted to fight so just let it be.
Later that night I woke up in the middle of the night and tried to hold my wife but all I could think about was this other woman and I felt guilty and I had to go back to my side of the bed. We got into a big fight a couple days later and talked very little with each other the rest of that day and the following day. I was feeling very distant from her and just couldn't bring myself to start up a conversation with her. I know I don't communicate well especially when angry. We eventually had a conversation and she feels I don't spend enough time with her, that's her biggest problem with things. I'm an extremely busy person especially in the summertime so I know I don't spend as much time with her as I should but it feels like every time we are together we get into these stupid fights so I think subconsciously maybe I'm not putting forth as much effort as I should to spend time with her. I told her my concerns during our talk and she seemed to listen and understand where I'm coming from. The thing was during most of this conversation my mind was wandering to thoughts of this other woman. I can't control myself, I just don't know how to get this woman out of my mind. I bruise easily so if I use the elastic band approach I will have a big purple spot around my wrist to explain so not sure that is the best technique for me. I'm mostly venting at this point as I don't have someone to talk to this about in person but I welcome any further comments