This may seem like a dumb thread but it is something that I noticed recently and made me think.

A few days back someone facebooked a photo taken of a group shot, and I noticed yet again I am standing on the edge and there is a bigger gap between me and the nearest person. It's happened before, yet at the time it was taken I felt I was maybe standing too close, looking at the photo that's so obviously not so.

I was concerned I might be standing too close and particularly as that person was a man (just an acquaintence but I did not want to be improper plus also my husband gets jealous so I am mindful of my behaviour around other men).

It's just a little thing but it made me feel sad, and a bit odd one out - everyone else is standing closely together. Maybe I have poor spatial awareness but it didn't feel like I was so apart yet clearly I was.

I think it underlies that I do still hold myself apart from others (those who have read my other posts will know I had literally no friends for a good part of my adulthood). Not sure if I can close that gap metaphorical or otherwise - sometimes wish I wasn't so odd.