I just remember my best friend from middle school through college saying when I came out to her something to the effect that it was okay to be bi, but I could never act on it. It seems benign talking about it now, but it broke my heart and destroyed our friendship then.

I've struggled to accept having ANY sexual feeling and even though I've been in a heterosexual relationship with the same person for nearly 3 years, I'm still nervous and uncomfortable with sex. There are so many things I'd like to try, but if I'm too nervous about just basic sex, then anything past that would be terrifying. I don't know if that makes sense. He'd be fine if I experienced being with a girl, but I never ever would. I would just be jealous of him for experiencing it, even though he's technically experiencing it with me.

Throughout my life, my sexual desires have been gross, wrong, or creepy. I can't undo that damage.